Bipolar: You Can’t Take it Personally

In a previous post, I highlighted the importance of not taking blame for a loved one’s affliction with bipolar disorder. The more I research the supporting side of the illness, the more I see people willing to walk away from a potentially strong and loving relationship with someone with bipolar.

From reading blog posts, forum discussions, direct interaction and of course managing bipolar relationships myself, I can fully understand why some people are willing to turn away and admit that this type of relationship is not for them and at the end of the day, this is not necessarily a bad thing to admit.

Bipolar disorder is very well known for damaging, if not destroying seemingly invincible relationships anywhere between basic acquaintances to well established marriages. In depth discussions with my own wife allows me to educate myself even further and strengthen my resolve when her disorder turns her against me.

Even after years of being together, I do find that my having to take a step back and remind myself every so often that her attacks are not personal and that her love for me is not wavering regardless of what spews out of her.

It is not easy to sit quietly and soak in the vulgarities and outright anger that may be displayed during an outburst and it is even harder to watch your loved one seem almost possessed and attack you directly. Even harder so, for those that are uneducated or not familiar with handling a bipolar relationship is to understand what is going on in the mind of a bipolar individual.

Individuals that are indeed bipolar, will generally do whatever it takes to hide any evidence that they have the disorder to begin with. Whether it be from embarrassment or fear of rejection, even after an outburst has occurred, the bipolar individual would rather let go of the relationship if the person on the other end has been hurt enough to do so, than to help them understand what has just happened.

This is not necessarily an attack to friends and loved ones, however, the disorder makes it that much more difficult to reach out for help and acceptance. Unfortunately, the disorder will also fight to allow the individual to apologize and accept help at the same with so there is an ever greater need for understanding from those involved if they are willing to stick around for the long haul.

With a passion to reach out and to help others, Rich opens up a direct view into the trials and tribulations that come with managing a bipolar relationship and how to use real-world techniques to aid in stability and support.

Rich Wallace

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