Comments on: Supporter’s Vow: I Won’t Let You Fall Apart

By: Rich Wallace

Rich Wallace — Tue, 01 Jun 2010 17:33:19 +0000

Blog Post: Supporter's Vow: I Won't Let You Fall Apart | The Bipolar Spouse http://bit.ly/X4UKK #bipolar #mentalhealth

By: Rich Wallace

Rich Wallace — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 00:23:08 +0000

Hello NLF, thanks for visiting the site and for taking time to comment.

Hypersexuality in the bipolar world is more of a common challenge than we'd like to consider, especially when it affects us directly. In the eyes of the affected, it may indeed "not have happened" due to the disorder putting our loved ones into a state of disassociation if the conditions are right, so it can be hard to believe what is being said at times since even our loved one can tune it out as though it didn't happen at all.

How frequent the behavior is depends on one's diagnosis and overall individuality so I am unable to offer a prediction on how and when issues may arise again, if they do. Unfortunately, even the right combination of treatment including psychiatric/psychological or medicinal may not make all of the challenges disappear.

The correct treatment plan can make it easier for our loved ones to recover and manage, but bipolar disorder is very unpredictable and can bring on episodes at anytime in some cases.

Good luck and thanks again for commenting.
-Rich

By: NLF

NLF — Wed, 06 Jan 2010 00:08:24 +0000

My husband was diagnosed a few months ago with bipolar and is currently on medications that have been ever changing. His judgment has been significantly impaired througout our married life of 30 years. This diagnosis explains many of the crisis in our lives.

Most recently I have become aware that there have been several emotional affairs with at least one becoming physical. He claims there was no "sex" just contact.. I don't know what to believe as he has told so many lies and it may not matter now that he is being treated.

My husband has betrayed me in numerous ways through the years and "turned" on me. How frequent is this behavior with bipolar spouses? On meds does it "go away".

By: Rich Wallace

Rich Wallace — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 21:48:51 +0000

Hi Laura, thank you for sharing and I'm so glad you found the site. Please know that although such rough patches are common, they are not impossible to recover from. Ensure that your partner is also educating himself in this process as if he chooses to do so, this will be a part of both of you and your future together. Your feelings of offering a "way out" is commendable, but at the same time, let the ultimate decision be his and don't push too hard if you can help it. The process is easier when you have more support and understanding, so please hang in there and know that it can indeed be managed.

By: Laura

Laura — Mon, 21 Dec 2009 20:41:26 +0000

I just finished a major mixed state…I tore him to shreds like he has never felt before. At the time I don't know it but after I am aware of what I did and then I break down sobbing the next day. I hate it!!!!! I hate hurting him. I have only been diagnosed for 2 months so they are still adjusting my meds and I am really hoping things balance out reasonably. He wants to get married but I am holding off. I want to leave him a way out as I am better off alone and not bring another person into this. Thank you so much for the website as it has such a warm human aspect to it as opposed to the clinical.

By: RichWallace

RichWallace — Tue, 10 Nov 2009 00:57:25 +0000

You're welcome and thank you for sharing!

By: Isa

Isa — Mon, 09 Nov 2009 15:56:34 +0000

Thanks for this. I've struggled with mental illness since the beginning of my relationship, and my boyfriend and I have been together five years now. He has always stood by me and supported me, even when I'm having a hard time, even when I'm being nasty, even when I'm so depressed that I can't see anything outside my own pain. He's a lifesaver, and I'm glad you provide your wife with the same loyalty and support.

By: Rich Wallace

Rich Wallace — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 18:13:54 +0000

Thank you for checking in and also for the kinds words!

By: Margaret Wallace

Margaret Wallace — Tue, 03 Nov 2009 08:32:27 +0000

My partner rapid cycles due to more than a decade of misdiagnoses, antidepressants and Akathesia

Mixed states are a stable diet of his bipolar, depression and hypomania are almost a relief from the mixed states although thankfully now it is finally beginning to slow down and he stabilize.

we have run the gauntlet, spent time homeless in shelters with my daughters during the worst of it

what you say rings so true

Thankyou

By: Rich Wallace

Rich Wallace — Sun, 01 Nov 2009 16:10:58 +0000

I'm so sorry Tammy…I know this can be trying to both individuals and the amount of strength it takes to truly understand this type or challenge is tough to measure. It's not easy to see a bright side of divorce, but at the same time, and all due respect to your ex, maybe he's just not ready or equipped to handle such a challenge. At the end of the day, it may be a positive to both of you as you truly need a solid support system and now you know that one did not exist, so you can rebuild. On the other side of the coin, if he had stayed and was unable to accept these challenges, the marriage and the relationship would probably bring both of you more stress and anger than love and patience.

All the best and my thoughts are with you.